John de Ruiter Podcast 489

John de Ruiter Podcast 489

No Longer Torn: Letting Goodness Choose

When: May 23, 2013 @ 2:00pm
Where: ,
This person is feeling pain and fear around a big life change she wants to make, but her partner doesn’t. How can this be resolved, and what really matters?
“Make your deepest choices by what you know in your heart. You don’t have anything else. If you don’t come from that, then what are you?”
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Podcast Transcript

No Longer Torn: Letting Goodness Choose

Q: There’s this issue related to moving from Israel to Canada. I know what is right, inside, but I do not manage to arrange it in a way that my family flows with this and I’m being, like, torn because if it is about me to wait til my inner power makes it happen, I feel it will take years. My partner is very strongly into his career, and I just feel like I cannot stay here because I just need to move. I’m afraid, also, to make a mistake; that maybe he’s my grounding. But if I wait for this to happen it will take us maybe years. It’s so intense in me, as if my path is again dependent on someone else.

John: You need to do what you know.

Q: Even in the cost of leaving him behind?

John: Without you being what you know in your heart, you don’t have anything for your self or for anyone. You’re completely dependent on being and doing what you know for you to be in what you know is meaning. You’re not rooted in meaning if you’re not being and doing what you know. Those in relationship with you are also dependent on your being and doing what you know. Their deepest relationship with you is entirely dependent on that, so then you be what you know the truth of in your heart, and you do what you know the truth of in your heart, and include your self and them in every real way that you can.

Q: And if he resists the change because of fear and all kinds of things, should I embrace it and wait, or just…?

John: Embrace being and doing what you know and heartfully include him in every way you can. Don’t make your deepest choices by his resistance or yours. Make your deepest choices by what you know in your heart. You don’t have anything else. If you don’t come from that, then what are you? Your heart can melt, crack, break and bleed, but you’ll do what you know. So then, really, you know what you know, your heart melts, you be and do what you know.

If you are coming from the deepest that you have awakened to and responding to the deepest that you have awakened to, then that is a lot of woman to your man. Be in your deepest stride and stretch, with your whole heart embracing him, and give only as much to his arguments, to his reasoning, as he is coming from the deepest that he is awakened to. You can be clear instead of torn. If you are torn, then everything of yours is torn. Be clear instead of torn….heartfully clear.

Establish what the two of you are in relationship for: deep, clear goodness. A career is not a life. An innermost manifested is a life. What is a career without the most deep, dear supply of goodness? It is that goodness that makes everything, including career. Put the roots in the goodness by choosing by the goodness. Being torn means that there is more goodness for you to be in than what you’re in. It’s all about the goodness. It’s all about the goodness you know.

Q: But the form, it is like blocking the ability to bring it out.

John: That necessitates the integration of your self. That’s what pressure is for. When there’s pressure, you need to integrate. What matters most is from where and from what, within, that you integrate.

Q: And can I do it myself?

John: Is the goodness in you?

Q: Yes, it’s accessible but sometimes it’s hard to get there… it’s obscured.

John: If the goodness is in you, then you’re able. Depend on the goodness. Put your roots into it and live by it. Choose by it, decide by it. Then it’s your walk.

Of course, you’ll have difficulty. Some of the difficulty will be more than your self. It’s not more than the goodness, and it’s not more than you. And it’s not more than your heart. Put your whole heart into the goodness and you will develop and stretch beyond what your self is, and your self will grow.

That’s what you teach your child when your child is timid or afraid. You ground your child in its heart. You ground it in its own goodness by coming from the same in you. Your child realizes and learns by example. It doesn’t matter how timid and afraid you are in your self. What matters is what your feet are in and that your walk is all about the goodness. You will be balancing all along the way.

When you’re coming from the goodness, in your self you will make mistakes, and you’re not mistaken in what you’re coming from. The mistakes are in applying the goodness to your self and to your life, and with all of those mistakes love learning. Grow from them instead of holding back because of them. Grow and thrive in the goodness you know. Be letting him know that he has your heart and that the goodness, within, is what fills it; that he has your goodness-filled heart. Be and do what you know and include him.

You need to be clear. You’re able to be clear. You know the goodness. Without the goodness you’re separate from the goodness. It’s from within the goodness that you live and you breathe.

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