Using the analogy of awakening as the experience of golden sunshine, John explains what's happening when clouds seem to cover it, and how to remain oriented to your love of the sun.
John responds to a mother's wish to understand why her young daughter still seems unhappy, despite her best efforts at parenting.
Two young people put their questions to John at an open mic:
Q1: What is fear?
John: When you focus on something that’s not nurturing and real inside, then you separate from what’s nurturing and real. As soon as you’re separate from what’s nurturing and real, you’ll fear because the nurture and the real isn’t there, so what you’re left with is lack that’s represented in your emotions.
When you have fear that means that you’ve created some distance from what’s nurtureful inside, such as a restedness, a really quiet okayness, a tenderness. Go away from tenderness inside and you’ll fear. Inside of the tenderness there is no fear.
Q2: How do I handle my anger?
John: In one way the feeling of anger is really good because it quickly tells you that you’re believing something that’s not true. So as soon as you feel angry, let go of everything that you’re thinking until your heart becomes open and settled again. As soon as your heart is opened and settled again, you’re really there. While you’re angry your heart is closed and hard, and you’re no longer really there in your heart.
When you’re angry, you’re caught in something that isn’t real. As soon as you’re angry, let go of what you’re thinking and what you’re feeling. As soon as you do, your heart opens again. When your heart is open, instead of being upset, you’ll love.
When you’re angry, what that really means is that you’ve tricked your self. You’ve tricked your self into believing something that isn’t true and that isn’t real.
“The increase delivers a gift. In the decrease, all you actually have to live by is that gift, the knowledge of it, while you feel and think otherwise.”
“My sole purpose is to be, in life, what we are after we’ve died. Through openness and softness of heart and core-splitting honesty at any personal cost, I live as that while actualizing the same in others I meet. I am available as a resource for anyone who recognizes and values this way of being.”
– John de Ruiter
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