Excerpt from a dialogue with John de Ruiter on September 13,  2014

Q: Do you think that we humans are actually in control of anything? Do we decide, or is it all decided already?

John: Your destiny is determined directly by what you’re coming from. With every choice you make, you’re making micro changes to your destiny, but your destiny is still going to be basic. If you have a self-orientation, your destiny will have everything to do with self-orientation. With every choice you make there’ll be micro changes in your self-oriented destiny. It’s a destiny based on illusion, but you’re not locked into that. It’s not an absolute because you know more than what you experience in your self. You know more than what reality appears like to you. You know that there’s deeper within than anything that you’ve experienced. That’s what your destiny belongs to. When you respond to what you know is deeper, you go straight to it. You go home to that, knowing that there’s more within than anything that you’ve experienced. When you make that shift, your destiny fundamentally shifts. Then you’re in a destiny of what you really are, instead of the destiny of the kind of self you have.

Q: Do you think I decided to come here and meet you? Was it my decision?

John: It doesn’t matter. What really matters, because of what you really know, is that we’ve met. The only reason that matters is because when we meet, you know something you didn’t know before. Now you know more, and what matters more than anything is what you know the truth of. Our meeting really matters. What really matters is your relationship with what you know the truth of.

Q: Do you think that, awakened or not, we will all come home after we die?

John: Does it matter what I think?

Q: Does it?

John: Not very much.

Q: It matters what you know. Do you know if we all come home?

John: Yes. As soon as you die you’ll be relieved of having been separate while you were living. What you’ll also be relieved of is the enormous opportunity that you had when you were living, to be oneness as a being that has a body, a heart and a self, to live your life being what you really are from the innermost outward. That opportunity will be over. Your opportunity as awareness to evolve while you’re in this body is massively greater than after you’ve died. Of essence now is the measure of difficulty that you experience, the measure of hardship. Everything has difficulty, demand, and stress to it, and if you add up all of that and see it all for what it really is, that’s the measure of your opportunity as awareness to evolve.

That’s what you’re here for. You’re not here to have a good and a wonderful life. You’re here to evolve in whatever kind of life you’re in. It’s your evolution as awareness that matters. If you’re not in that, then your whole life is like a drug.

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