Q: I’m really enjoying knowing and how that connects with you and with loving you. Belonging to knowing is like being close to you and I can see the filters and boundaries that I still have about that.
John: You don’t need those filters and boundaries for you to love. The use of those filters and boundaries in loving doesn’t make you safe. It doesn’t actually protect anything, it doesn’t accomplish anything real. Knowing is safe, and you don’t need the perceived safety of the structures in your self. When you’re being knowing, you’ll love and you’ll love only in the way you know. So in knowing, you’ll fulfill the true balance of what is real in the love and what doesn’t need to be.
Q: How do I move past my filters and boundaries?
John: You know to love and when you love the filters and boundaries will naturally soften.
Q: It will move through my self and person.
John: In a way that is incidental.
Q: But that’s the bit that is uncomfortable for me.
John: You’ll certainly lose the comfort zone in your self. When you’re moving in intimacy of being, that moves without any care of filters and boundaries in your self. It moves in care of your self and relieves your self of its filters and boundaries, and all of the structuring that it doesn’t need, enabling your self to move eventually in the way that you’re moving.
Q: Paying attention to what’s coming up in my self.
John: When you pay attention to that, you don’t love. What you do is concern.
Q: So then it’s just coming back to loving. It seems that I’m reaching for a continuum of being knowing.
John: Then, as awareness, completely abandon to knowing and all that moves is love. What kind of self you have is absolutely incidental.
Q: I’m just instantly distracted.
John: What you’ve been and done in your self has trained your self. You’ve trained your self to distract you from what matters more. Training your self works. When you retrain your self, that will also work.
Q: You really have to commit to it.
John: The purity of it is when you as awareness just simply belong to knowing, you will love. It doesn’t matter what is occurring or not occurring, it doesn’t matter what kind of self you have, you will love and when you love, that is going to put the relationship you’re accustomed to in your self in disarray. When it does, then you belong to knowing, and in belonging to knowing you love.
Q: It’s like developing new pathways then?
John: Yes. There are the intricacies to all the different ways you can move, the deeper levels in you and the deeper levels in your body. For you to love me, you will automatically move in balance. You’ll automatically move in the deeper level within at the time. The reason that works is because when you think of me, that puts you into all of the deeper levels in you. When you relate to me, you relate from all of those deeper levels. So when you love me, you automatically move in balance within your deeper levels because you’re doing what I’m doing in my deeper levels. What you’re knowing in me is balance, so when you’re loving me you’re being balanced.
Q: Because it’s loving you not from my self.
John: That isn’t what you do anyway.
Q: What do you mean?
John: When you love me, you don’t love me from your self. When you relate to me you don’t relate to my self, you relate to the much that I’m coming from. So when you love me, you are naturally not using your self. You’re using what you intuitively know I’m coming from.
Q: For me it’s more a sense that I know you. That’s easier for me than loving you. For me they’re the same and then there’s instantly opening and softening.
John: Knowing me puts you into an awareness of everything you know. Loving me puts you into movement of everything you know.
Q: Does loving you engage the being?
John: It doesn’t engage the being more, it engages your being. When you love me and look at him, all of the deeper levels in you are already engaged and they immediately engage him. When you love me, you will flood him. You don’t know anything else.
Q: Is that a little bit like how it is for people in the chair with you, there’s just this love coming in?
John: When awareness belongs to knowing, there isn’t anything else. In sustaining that and being rooted in that, then the deeper levels fill your heart and flood your heart. As you remain in that under the pressures of your conditioned self, the goodness fills and spills over and floods your self. When your self is flooded, your self comes around.