John de Ruiter Transcripts

Mined from our archive of more than two decades of teachings, JdR Gems is a sparkling collection of conversations with John, mostly not published before and much too good to miss. They range from tiny tips for everyday life to revealing our deepest destiny, and come from recordings made anywhere John has met with us, including international meetings, livestreams, camping trips, social gatherings and the Jewel Café.

Two young people put their questions to John at an open mic:

Q1: What is fear?

John: When you focus on something that’s not nurturing and real inside, then you separate from what’s nurturing and real. As soon as you’re separate from what’s nurturing and real, you’ll fear because the nurture and the real isn’t there, so what you’re left with is lack that’s represented in your emotions.

When you have fear that means that you’ve created some distance from what’s nurtureful inside, such as a restedness, a really quiet okayness, a tenderness. Go away from tenderness inside and you’ll fear. Inside of the tenderness there is no fear. 

Q2: How do I handle my anger?

John: In one way the feeling of anger is really good because it quickly tells you that you’re believing something that’s not true. So as soon as you feel angry, let go of everything that you’re thinking until your heart becomes open and settled again. As soon as your heart is opened and settled again, you’re really there. While you’re angry your heart is closed and hard, and you’re no longer really there in your heart. 

When you’re angry, you’re caught in something that isn’t real. As soon as you’re angry, let go of what you’re thinking and what you’re feeling. As soon as you do, your heart opens again. When your heart is open, instead of being upset, you’ll love.

When you’re angry, what that really means is that you’ve tricked your self.  You’ve tricked your self into believing something that isn’t true and that isn’t real. 

Latest Transcript

Young People Speak With John: On Fear And Anger

April 14, 2023

Two young people put their questions to John at an open mic: Q1: What is fear? John: When you focus on something that’s not nurturing and real inside, then you separate from what’s nurturing and real. As soon as you’re separate from what’s nurturing and real, you’ll fear because the nurture and the real isn’t there, so what you’re...

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Q: I want to clear up something with my father before he dies. I know the difference between being open and closed, but when I step into my parents’ home it’s very hard for me to stay open. It’s as if I step back into the child that sees
Q: How can I melt my frozen heart? John: Like that you have a heart, even though it’s frozen. That melts it a little bit. As your heart melts a little bit, you’ll know more. As soon as you know more in your heart, surrender to what you’re knowing.
Q:  My question is how to get to my next level of awareness. I’ve suffered a lot of pain this year and had an emergency operation. I didn’t see how dangerous the situation was. I stayed in my pain and arrived at the hospital almost at the last moment.
Q: I need help opening my heart. (Crying) I haven’t been able to. John: Then wherever you go, give it. Giving your heart puts you in your heart. If you seem to not know how to open your heart, give your heart. As soon as you’re giving your heart,

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