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Deeply Enjoying Your Father

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When: November 23, 2017
Evening Meeting

Q: My father has a mental health condition that’s rapidly getting worse. He’s so sweet and vulnerable in it. When I told him I was coming to this seminar he said “say a prayer for me.” I don’t know what to do for him, and I really love him. Can you help me?

John: Deeply within, enjoy what is there. Enjoy him as he loses his mind.  As he loses his mind he’s able to realize differently. As he loses his mind he’s losing his old pathways, pathways that he didn’t need when his mind was good. As he loses those pathways, his opportunity is to be openness that isn’t held together or governed by familiarity.  His opportunity is to love without a construct.

Q: Is it like in a newborn baby, before the child learns to have expression?

John: It’s a little more like a small child when it gets sick. When it’s still in its innocence and a small child gets sick, it’s whole interior opens and that interior moves from within the deep in a way that isn’t usual. It isn’t usual for that child so you see a different face in that child. You see a level of its interior up in its face, a level of its interior that’s different, and if that child isn’t just sick, but has a fever, then you see something that’s different again. Both are real.

It’s a little like your father is coming into a heavy fever and it isn’t going to go away. As he comes into that fever it’s easier to see him. If he doesn’t close and harden in it, his self becomes a little less visible and he becomes a little bit more visible. As he is opening in the midst of losing some of his mind he’s freely losing some of his form. What becomes so visible is what was always there before, but perhaps a little covered. In this way, as he is losing his mind, you are getting to know him.  

Q: Is there anything that I can give to him in that?

John: Instead of giving him anything, sweetly enjoy him as you did when you were really little. Instead of seeing the loss of his mind, see him as he shows more and more. Directly enjoy him while some of his form is passing away. While you’re with him enjoy that you are going to lose your mind when you die – or earlier. That makes it easier for him to see you. Your mind is for what you are without your mind.  

Q: Is it like that for a little child before it loses its innocence?

John: Yes. When innocence has a mind, innocence loves thinking. When you leave your innocence then you become stuck with thinking. When you’re in your innocence it is love that is thinking. Love that is thinking shows in the eyes. It shows in all of the face. If he has the presence of mind, when you see him again, and he asks you “what was your time like here?” then tell him that you got to know him more.

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John de Ruiter TRANSCRIPTS

on This Topic

Q: I need help opening my heart. (Crying) I haven’t been able to. John: Then wherever you go, give it. Giving your heart puts you in your heart. If you seem to not know how to open your heart, give your heart. As soon as you’re giving your heart,

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