Q: I’ve been wanting to speak with you about moving in deeper sexuality in the absence of a relationship. A deeper level of sexuality opened in my body that wasn’t connected to my self or its wants and needs. It moved as love moves through my heart and through my body. I experienced it whenever I was in more than my self or when I related directly to you and what you mean to me. It feels like love in my body. It’s like a quiet background hum in my body. It feels like sexual energy but it doesn’t feel sexual anymore. There’s a quality of dearness to it that wasn’t there before. It’s like a dear treasure that I cherish. I have a sense that it’s just to love.
John: When the awakening of the deeper levels of you has your heart, the deeper levels of your body open. As the opening of the deeper levels of your body has your heart, your sexuality moves in a way that is different from what you’re accustomed to.
As these deeper levels have your heart, your deeper sexuality comes into your womanness. Your womanness is in your self and in your body. When your deeper sexuality opens and moves, and that moves into your womanness, you realize the difference between your womanness and your self. Your deeper womanness is empowered by your deeper sexuality.
It’s through your deeper womanness that your own being comes into your living. It doesn’t move sexuality in what you’ve been used to; it moves, in your living, your deeper ability to meet and commune. Within your deeper womanness you have a non-gender invitation toward all to meet and to commune, making you as a woman safe to come close to without that activating your sexuality: availability without promise or need. You being fully in your self through your own deeper womanness, while at the same time being free of your self.
As you live from your deeper womanness in your self and in your person, you come into high-level womanness. In high-level womanness you have the ability as a person to transmit what your being is to others, making your principal attractiveness that you are in your person in your living, a being.
Your deeper sexuality needs to be free to move in all of your body without that movement being about your self, bringing up a much deeper womanness and a womanness which has surpassed your self. The integration of your sexuality enables you, in your self, through your own deeper womanness, to be free of power in the midst of power, making you safe, freeing your own being to come into your person; your power used to attract others to their own being.
The integration of your sexuality makes you the continuity of all of your levels. Sexuality is no longer identified through attraction or aversion, then it doesn’t activate your self. Your power then activates you. It activates you, as meaning, enabling you to be the continuity of all of your levels. Your sexuality as you have known doesn’t belong to your self. It belongs to meaning, in how meaning moves through your deeper levels, being manifest in your self.
In integrating your own sexuality by coming from the deepest within that you have awakened to, you come into your power to connect your levels, making you its continuity, enabling you to connect the levels in others simply by you being them.
Power not integrated is the reflection existing in your self of the power of your own being, that isn’t yet your own being.
Q: You mean the power that’s misused by the self, like in negativity?
John: In your self you experience it as the power to create a blend, a blend between you and someone else. When you use that, it gives you the illusion, as an experience, that you are able to move another, enabling you in your self to have. As you use that power in your self, you function in a way that isn’t at all like your being, thereby separating you from your own being, making your own self a form of separation. Through its use, you become worse.
Through the use of what you know the truth of in your heart, you heal. As you live that healing, your self heals. Your relationship with power is given over to what you know in your heart and, in that way, your power is given to your own being. Your being fills your heart. Your being-filled-heart is then your only way within your self, opening the deeper levels within.
With these deeper levels within taken to heart, the deeper levels of your body open. Your sexuality opens and is moved by the deeper levels within. It’s a different sexuality. Babies move in it. It’s how they move. The beingness of nature moves in it. In that way when you have a deeper connection with nature, you are brought to your own being.
The deeper levels of sexuality are not experienced as sexuality until after puberty, bringing your awareness to what is next in your beingness to integrate. When that energy is directed toward your self, you bypass the integration and your own sexuality becomes a form of separation.