Q: As I notice this movement coming from the core of my self, or a deep flow of awareness moving up through my body and through my face, I notice a vulnerability, a great sensitivity to subtle changes that are happening in the energy space that’s around me.
John: Lovely. Then you’re in the deeper levels of your body, because you are in the deeper levels of you, while you’re in your body, and you’ll feel that in your nervous system. It changes your spatial sense of reality.
Q: It seems that there’s a very subtle flow of everyone’s awareness moving through the space and helping to participate in co-creating the space. Does the being that moves through each of us, does it trace back down to the same source? Are we all ‘I’s of the same being?
John: Yes. Precisely. Beautifully. Any slight sense of meaning, tiniest little bit of meaning that you experience, on any level, with anyone or about anything is there because of your being. It’s the presence of your being and it wouldn’t matter how much you separate from your being, you’re not capable of excluding all of it. So, no matter what, it keeps seeping in. And there isn’t anything as meaningful as you being responsive to that; that in all of your life there isn’t anything that you are as sensitive to as that. It’s everything. It’s the beingness of what you really are.
Q: I’m noticing that there’s this touching of being on the outside with this being from the inside, and that there’s just a very delicate sense of noticing the tone and the texture just of this particular touch. Is that the same as meaning?
John: That’s you being the intimate witness of meaning, which keeps you really close to your being, very much in touch with it, but still, in some way, on the outside. You’re free to be on the inside in everything moving outwards. You, one with your being, in endless ways, sweetly seeping into all of your self and all of your life: the meaning of your life.
Q: Is love the same thing as being moving to touch?
John: Yes. More deeply than that, it is your being, and your being moving, in your self, to touch. What is touched in that is your heart.
Q: I’m noticing, somehow, the movement of that being from the heart, moving up in almost these little plumes of something that rises from that space and then meets itself and touches itself, and at the meeting point is the formation of self?
John: That’s you, within your being, coming up into a little bit more available form, form that’s available in your self. It’s available to your being. As long as it’s your being that you’re coming from, your being gets to have your self.
Q: Is there some sense in which it chooses?
John: No. It’s natural, like breathing. You can choose to breathe, but you’ll interrupt its flow and rhythm. As soon as you relax, you breathe. As you are one with your being, because you are being what you really are, that natural, effortless movement into your self turns your self into a self of change. Every little bit of movement of you, being the same as your being up into your self, changes something in your self. It’s non-stop until you identify with something in your self. It’s like parking in your self, making your self important, and for a time putting your being on hold. You’ll go back to it later but then the habit of identifying with your self covers up what you’ve left behind. And then after a time, when you try to find your way back, you’ll invariably use the habit of your self that you’ve created to help you get back, which only serves to strengthen that identity.
Q: How does that identity become molten again?
John: Through a deep, quiet, delicate honesty, and you begin to see again as a being instead of foremost as a self.
Q: Stepping into being as itself, identity with being rather than identity with the self?
John: You wouldn’t have an identity with your being. You’re just sweetly lost in it. You’re so at home in your being that you wouldn’t leave it for anything in your self, or anything in your life. So then it is you in your being that your self really belongs to, and your life belongs to. It will show in the littlest things. The really little things in your life will matter more to you than the big things. That means that you’re sensitive from within your being to everything in your self.
Q: Is it a giving away of all of those big things that are out there to the small things?
John: It’s like that. The big things in your life will be sweetly all right, while you’ll love the little things, such as doing up your buttons or tying your shoelaces; that the really little details have so much meaning because you’re so deeply in them. In whatever it is you do, you keep emerging, blossoming. It isn’t dependent on what you do. It’s all dependent on what you’re being.
Q: Probably more than with anybody I’ve ever encountered, I notice a really smooth consistency to how you stay in that space. Do you experience it as staying in that space?
John: No. It’s more like I don’t know how not to, whereas decades ago it was much to my dismay that I didn’t know how to.
Q: Did it all come rushing in, suddenly, at once? Or was it a slow and gradual transition?
John: All at once. When your response as awareness is only to the core, it is all at once. That’s you just simply being what you’re made of. It’s natural. Make of it a practice or a path and you corrupt your self, making your self seem important where, deep within, you know it isn’t. What you really are needs no sense of accomplishment. There isn’t anything to have. There isn’t anything to do until what you really are, one with your being, is in a body. Then the creative impetus to do is enormous, and it’s all-transformative until you separate a little bit from what you really are because of the sense of importance in your self of that flow. And then you begin to fool your self.
Q: It feels like hide and go seek, a little bit. It’s there and present, and then somehow it recedes away.
John: Need it and it’s elusive. Enjoy it and you’re quickly it.
Q: Is the enjoyment of it the same thing as the letting go of it?
John: When you’re deeply letting go of it, the letting go is really just letting go of your personal self, your self in relationship to what you really are. With that fundamental let-go, which is just you, awareness, relaxing, you enjoy being what you really are.
The sweetest, most beautiful example of that that I’ve ever seen was a small child being in a fit, a red-faced fit of rage, and in the space of about a second-and-a-half dropped everything and was smiling, happy, open-eyed, all sweet beingness, no problem! And it didn’t lose anything.
Q: How does this relate to having a sense of wonder?
John: That’s what it then has in seeing anything, whether it’s the crack in the sidewalk or someone’s face. In whatever it looks at, it really sees.
Q: Like a newness of seeing. You don’t look as tall when you’re sitting down.
John: I’m much littler than you think.
Q: What a deep blessing. Thank you.