599 – Parenting: What Your Child Really Wants from You
John responds to a mother’s wish to understand why her young daughter still seems unhappy, despite her best efforts at parenting.
Q: Earlier, you mentioned watching a child losing its genuine smile, and that genuine emotion and moving into knowing that it could use that in a disingenuous way. I could really see in my childhood the moment that that happened. Many times I’ve thought that my emotions are untrustworthy, that all of those things after that happened had just been constructed as a way to protect my self. And you had given another example of someone on their deathbed and a child coming in and bringing genuineness into that, where it can lighten the mood in the room just because it’s a genuine emotion that a child brings. How do I begin to peel back those constructs to get back to that genuine place that a child comes from?
John: Don’t peel them back; you’ll find all of your reasons not to. Instead of peeling them back, be deep, quiet, pure golden realness that’s underneath it all. Be that unconditionally and at any personal expense, and everything that is not that will, on its own, dry up and fall off.
Being the deep, quiet real within means that you give that all of your power. You give it your belief and everything else of yours that has become actual through you believing what you didn’t know the truth of will no longer have a life supply. It won’t have a power supply and because it isn’t real, on its own, it will cease to exist without you doing anything with it, whereas the real – if you separate from the real, live being other than that which is real – won’t cease to exist. It wouldn’t matter how much you cover it up, how much you live separate from it, without it, it stays real, but all covered up. If you’re being the core of that, that you return to being that core, that core isn’t going to peel anything back. It isn’t going to deal with your self. What it will do, within the whole field of your self, is live.
Q: That sounds so simple but I know that in that there’s a sense of loss, a rediscovering of that core person that sounds beautiful and terrifying at the same time.
John: The sense of loss isn’t real. What is terrifying in waking up isn’t real. The sense of feeling terrified and any sense of loss comes from you holding something in your self that isn’t what you really are. The sense of loss is a false emotion.
When you’re being your core, simply being your core, nothing else, instead of the emotion of loss, a sense of loss, what will come in as a fruit of what you really are is joy, peace. You don’t need any of it, but it will still come. You won’t treat it as yours. You won’t treat it as yours because you don’t need it, so all of the fruit that grows on your tree, you’ll give to others. Your emotional body is like a tree. Whatever you are being in that tree determines what grows on the tree. It determines the whole life of the tree.
As your core life source shifts, what takes place in your emotional body will all change. Your emotional body will reflect this real core of yours because you’re being it. Then when you smile it’s because there really is sunshine inside.
Any emotion that doesn’t nurture isn’t real. It’s actually there because of what you’re being in your emotional body. Any emotion that doesn’t nurture isn’t real, but it’s actual, and it’s there because it’s a reflection of how you relate, how you relate to your self, how you relate to others.
When your way of being within fundamentally shifts and you sustain it because it has your heart, it fills your heart, then instead of your emotional body being somewhat like a prickle bush, with just a little bit of time, it will turn into a fruit tree. That’s law. Whatever you are being is what you produce in your self. It’ll have form so that you can see it.
What all of that really points to, when you’re quieted within, is to everything that’s deeper than your self – at very least, your heart. From there, all of the humanness that fills; deeper than that, the streams of your being move your heart and your humanness.
599 – Parenting: What Your Child Really Wants from You
John responds to a mother’s wish to understand why her young daughter still seems unhappy, despite her best efforts at parenting.
598 – The Person, the Self and the Being: Identifying the Many Levels of You (Part 2)
This dialogue is a continuation of last week’s podcast 597. John speaks about what ego is, the power we have to create mystery to conceal what is clear, and what takes us deeper than personal integrity.
597 – The Person, the Self and the Being: Identifying the Many Levels of You (Part 1)
Person, self, being … what’s the difference and what is real? Using different analogies, John explains how our different levels connect and shares the code to being what we really are.
596 – Beyond Sadness and Pain: Happy Without a Reason
John reveals the source of the deep well of sadness and pain this person carries, and shares how she can reconnect with her original happiness.
595 – When a Crumb of Truth in Your Heart is Your Home
John responds to a spiritual dilemma: a desperate longing for realization, coupled with the fear of nothingness that seems to come with it.
594 – Fully Present in Your Body, Fully Present in Your Heart
Closing down to the experience of vulnerability can mean dissociating from the body. John shares a simple way to become more present however uncomfortable we feel.
“My sole purpose is to be, in life, what we are after we’ve died. Through openness and softness of heart and core-splitting honesty at any personal cost, I live as that while actualizing the same in others I meet. I am available as a resource for anyone who recognizes and values this way of being.”
– John de Ruiter
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