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From Fear To Compassion: Helping Your Child Understand This World

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When: May 6, 2016
Afternoon Open Mic
Topics:

Q: You’ve spoken about understanding the world and how it works, and then both moving and seeing beyond it. This world is hardly understandable for me, so can you guide me a little in how to be with my child as he starts to discover the world?

John: By you remaining in your heart you guide him into a heart understanding toward those in this world who are being just like this world.

Instead of him becoming fearful because of what people are easily like, when you guide him into a heart understanding you relieve him of his fear and the depth in him of feeling goes into compassion. He won’t fear being hurt by others. You’ll be introducing him to his deeper levels and to draw from them while he sees what others are being and doing.

Q: Sometimes he asks why things are that way. I’m already working with my reactions to it, but how can I bring my heart to helping him see with his heart? What do I say when he asks me why people do that to each other?

John: Because they’re believing something that isn’t true. That belief controls their behaviour. Without any beliefs you naturally relax into your heart. Beliefs of any kind force a performance that isn’t based in reality.

Q: Forcing a performance or going into reactivity?

John: And living for something that has nothing to do with the heart. Whatever someone invests in that, keeps them from returning to their heart.

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John de Ruiter TRANSCRIPTS

on This Topic

Q1: I work as a speech therapist with children. When I hear you speak, it reminds me of the importance in psychological theory for children to grow up with soft hearts, good relationships and protection in order to develop their potential. Can you say more about this? John: It’s true
Q: We’re having a baby. I really feel the baby is going to be our greatest teacher. John: Having a baby will strengthen whatever orientation you presently have. Q: Will it? It won’t be the opposite? John: If you are giving heed to the specialness of what’s there, and you’re taking that specialness
Q: I have a question about raising children and enjoying them in the way you’ve been describing. I have two daughters. John: How old are they? Q: Five and nine. I enjoyed the first child from the beginning, and it has been easy. The second is very different. From the moment

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