596 – Beyond Sadness and Pain: Happy Without a Reason
John reveals the source of the deep well of sadness and pain this person carries, and shares how she can reconnect with her original happiness.
Q: When you tell people to come in, you are welcoming them to move and realize your moving?
John: To come into my being, and the more you move in my being, the more your being moves.
Q: So when I have this connection with someone else as well, even though it’s mixed with self and patterns and subconscious and everything, still we copy each other’s movement in the deeper level, like a mirror? Or like a dirty mirror?
John: Yes.
Q: Is it connected to a deeper sexual energy movement?
John: Yes.
Q: Is it the same?
John: No. When the deeper levels of your being begin to really move, it does address your sexuality and as it does, your sexuality moves. It moves in your body and in your self because your being is moving, which isn’t what you’re accustomed to. What you’re accustomed to is that your sexuality moves with a certain kind of movement of your self that directly has to do with your experience of sexuality. When you awaken to the deeper levels of your being and these levels move up into your self and move your sexuality, your sexuality is being reconnected to your being.
As you are in response to that and relaxed in that, your sexuality is being freed of your self, while it still remains there in your self. Then, because of your sexuality being directly connected to your being, when your being moves your sexuality moves and when your sexuality moves, your being moves. It’s a gifting to your self, to you in your self, of your self being hormonally re-contextualized to the reality of your being.
Q: Is it connected to masculine and feminine movement inside of me?
John: The deeper levels of your being move more in a masculine way, and the more surface levels of your being that are closest to your heart move in more of a feminine way. That’s why as soon as you open and soften, which is very feminine, you are right there in your heart and already coming into your being, because there you are, while you’re opening and softening, being the same as your own being but at the surface of your being.
The more deeply you awaken to your being, the more power you begin to come into. The more powerful levels of your being are in the deeper levels, whereas the least powerful levels of your being are right there next to your heart, where your heart is like the door to your being.
As you enter that door, you’re being the same as your own being where there’s very little power. It’s by being that way in your self, within the powers of your self – you being one with the initial levels of your being while you’re in your self – that enables you to begin to integrate what you are as a being while in seen existence, which gives you access to deeper and deeper levels where there is more and more power. You can’t be these deeper levels, the more powerful levels, without you being mastered by openness and softness and warm okayness. In that way, you’re protected from exploiting your being.
Your being is incorruptible. As soon as you’re being even a little bit different from the deeper levels of your being but still open and soft, you’re in your being but at the surface of your being. As soon as you separate from that openness and softness and that warm okayness, you’re separate from your being by your own beingness. You’re being different. You’re letting your beingness be similar to the conditioning in your self. That beingness forbids access to your real levels that are just like what you really are. So you are beautifully protected from corrupting anything in you that is just like what you really are.
Q: So those levels won’t move if I identify or dealing with, for example, subconscious? My experience is things rising up and then I contract from fear of seeing and also using wrong my power, so it’s safe and deeper level won’t move.
John: The deeper levels of your being, as they move, because they have more to do with power, as these levels move up into your self they address what is most powerful in you. It isn’t your thinking and your feeling. It isn’t your will. It isn’t your emotion: it’s your sexuality. When your sexuality is connected to your being, it’s unlimited in its capacity for you, awareness, through your sexuality, to reach all the way into the deepest you’ve awakened to of your being, and your sexuality has the capacity to accurately express everything you’ve awakened to of your being.
The more that your sexuality belongs to your self and it’s separate from being connected to your being, the more limited it is. So its use can easily become frustrating because it promises so much and delivers so little. You know a resonance within your sexuality. When you listen to that resonance it seems to promise everything. What that resonance is, is a most delicate connectivity of your sexuality to your being.
Q: So what should I do differently? I try to understand what you say but …
John: You don’t need to understand what I’m saying. You’re resonating. That resonance, up into your self, resonates within your nervous system and there, within your own nervous system you come into most, through that resonance, the most subtle level of understanding. It’s not a cognitive understanding. What comes within that resonance in your nervous system is an invitation to you, awareness, in your self, and as you respond, the resonance increases because it is the resonance of your own being.
As you respond to the resonance, you’re being it. As you’re being it, it increases. You don’t need to understand cognitively. In your response to that resonance you are directly knowing the truth, and the more you respond, the more you know. As soon as you try to understand, you’re using something that isn’t like your being, so there you are being differently.
As you’re being differently from your own being, the resonance goes back down. In that way, it beautifully teaches you. It shows you how you really function, how you move as a being in your self. You open and it increases. As soon as you grab a hold of it and you want it to stay, it decreases. So then you become sophisticated. You try to open. The trying to open is there because you’re holding on to what you would like to experience. That’s like being a thief. You’re holding on to something that you want to take more of, so you approach your heart and you’re trying to open. You can enter your heart, but as you do, your heart hardens and it closes because it’s being just like you are, and as soon as the softening of you is genuine, and it’s not an opening and a softening to get something or to keep something, then your heart opens and softens, and as it does, the door, so to speak, to your being, opens and softens and you begin to stream in.
As soon as you experience the result of that in your self and you try to keep it, you are, by your own beingness, exiled from your being and you’re back in your self, separate from your being, holding on to the need of an experience in your self of your being.
As you see how it works then you can learn quickly or with great difficulty. That depends on whether you use your conditioning to try and have access to your being, or when you simply relax as awareness into what you know in your heart.
Your being opens to you because you’re being the same, and there you are, streaming into your being.
596 – Beyond Sadness and Pain: Happy Without a Reason
John reveals the source of the deep well of sadness and pain this person carries, and shares how she can reconnect with her original happiness.
595 – When a Crumb of Truth in Your Heart is Your Home
John responds to a spiritual dilemma: a desperate longing for realization, coupled with the fear of nothingness that seems to come with it.
594 – Fully Present in Your Body, Fully Present in Your Heart
Closing down to the experience of vulnerability can mean dissociating from the body. John shares a simple way to become more present however uncomfortable we feel.
593 – Honest to the Way of Your Heart
An exploration of how honesty and an open, soft heart are connected, taking us ever deeper into the unseen roots we could remain in forever.
592 – Beyond Self-Acceptance: The Way of Deep, Inner Healing
An experience of misplaced anger has raised the question of what real healing is. John takes us beyond simple self-acceptance, deep into the source of the finest healing of all.
591 – The Truth About Compassion
When is compassion self-centred, when is it real, and how can we tell? An exploration of what it means to be truly compassionate.
“My sole purpose is to be, in life, what we are after we’ve died. Through openness and softness of heart and core-splitting honesty at any personal cost, I live as that while actualizing the same in others I meet. I am available as a resource for anyone who recognizes and values this way of being.”
– John de Ruiter
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