John de Ruiter Transcripts

Mined from our archive of more than two decades of teachings, JdR Gems is a sparkling collection of conversations with John, mostly not published before and much too good to miss. They range from tiny tips for everyday life to revealing our deepest destiny, and come from recordings made anywhere John has met with us, including international meetings, livestreams, camping trips, social gatherings and the Jewel Café.

Q: My question is about working with people. I’ve been creating art for many years and I feel things are changing; I want to open more, expand and create with people. Do you have anything to say about that?

John: Don’t relate to helping people anymore. If you help someone, you’ll easily include a movement of your self. You’ll easily include a doing, using something that’s worked before; using something that you’ve learned. 

Instead of relating to helping someone, relate directly to meaning that’s presently there in the other, and that all you’re doing is removing a little bit of covering. It’s all about the meaning that’s there that you know and that you can see. 

If you help someone, you’ll easily put something of your self on someone. If you help, you’ll easily take while you’re giving. But if it’s meaning that you know and that you see in the other, and all you’re doing is removing a little bit of what covers it, then it is meaning that you’re using to uncover. You’re being meaning to meaning that you know and see. Your sense of self isn’t important in it, but in helping, your sense of self will have some importance. 

Q: Could you say more about meaning?

John: The meaning in another is their human goldenness: a concentration of humanness that has depth and quality, and it’s clean. It’s humanness right there in the other where it hasn’t been corrupted yet and it is just a little bit covered. When that’s real to you, then even a little movement toward the other uncovers a lot.  

What you are is like deep, quiet, still goodness that freely moves toward anyone, and no one needs your help. There, the littlest movement toward anyone is so good.

Latest Transcript

Real Help: Uncovering Goldenness In Another

February 1, 2023

Q: My question is about working with people. I’ve been creating art for many years and I feel things are changing; I want to open more, expand and create with people. Do you have anything to say about that? John: Don’t relate to helping people anymore. If you help someone, you’ll easily include a movement of your self. You’ll...

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Excerpts from two cafe conversations on building a real relationship: Q: I am wondering whether a relationship I am in is real, and whether we’re a match. Can you help me figure this out? John: To simplify it, stay away from being sexually physical. It’s not for moral reasons;
Q: What is the real purpose of sexual relationship? John: The perfect communion of you as a being, through all of your heart, including all of your self and all of your body. Sexuality is the engine of humanness. It belongs to your being, and when you move in

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