604 – Broken Relationship: The Kindness of a Hundred-Year Perspective
Imagine looking at the the pain of a lost relationship from the kindness of a hundred-year perspective. New possibilities will open, and John explains.
John de Ruiter Podcast 527
John de Ruiter Podcast 527
The Key to Heartful, Clear Parenting
When: September 11, 2011 @ 2:00pm
Where: Amsterdam, The Netherlands
Topics: Introductory, Parenting
In this simple, sweet teaching, John describes how to raise a child who will feel safe, seen, and who’ll not need to perform for love.
“Value a quiet love, enabling your child to read you deeply.”
- The Key to Heartful, Clear Parenting 00:00
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Podcast Transcript
The Key to Heartful, Clear Parenting
Q1: Hello, John. I would like to deepen the connection between me and my child, and my being aware of it. So I’d like it if you would help me to do that.
John: Be really seen. Reveal your heart and give your heart without embellishment, so that when you’re giving your heart, your heart-given is unadorned. Then your child is fully meeting you. Don’t push your way or have your own way. Don’t use any power to have what is personal for you at your child’s expense, and at the same time be kindly strong with what you are clear about.
All of this draws your child into being seen, being heard and not using any power to do so, inviting your child into a strength of clarity. With a richness of heart, make it really easy for your child to never need to lie. Value a quiet love, enabling your child to read you deeply. Then there’s room for supportive excitement. When you’re agitated in any way, like being slow to speak. And when you’ve fallen short in any way, like being quick to speak.
If you are happy in all of this, your child will be deeply safe and free to be seen in everything. Don’t try to correct your child or give instruction if at the same time you are not being seen. If you are being seen, your child will love learning from you. In the midst of your availability, share your realizations and your child will come into the same. If you are always giving your heart while being seen, giving your heart in a quieted way without embellishment, your heart being given unadorned, your child will know that it doesn’t have to do anything for love. Your child will grow up not being performance-oriented.
Don’t be overly motherly and your child will have no need of being childish.
John de Ruiter PODCASTS
on This Topic
603 – Your Deepest, Most Delicate Belonging
The sense of entering the second half of life is sharpening this person’s focus on what matters most, and raising some fundamental questions.
602 – Honest to the Core: Oneness in the Midst of Separation
A deep dive into the power of profound honesty to make oneness as reachable as going to sleep – without actually falling asleep.
601 – Don’t Go Figure, Go Sweetly Within
Sometimes, figuring things out doesn’t work in the way we expect. Dissolving core patterns is one example of this, and John explains why.
600 – Out of Your Comfort Zone, Into Your Heart
A perplexing and destructive habit is the focus of this dialogue. What could be so threatening about being touched by goodness?
599 – Parenting: What Your Child Really Wants from You
John responds to a mother’s wish to understand why her young daughter still seems unhappy, despite her best efforts at parenting.
