505 – Awakening to the More of You
Having been raised in a male environment, this person longs for more of the feminine qualities he’s now coming to know. As he speaks with John, it becomes clear that a shift in his relating is all that’s required.
Q: First, I would like to thank you for the talk we had in September last. You helped me very much with telling me not to worry about my son; just to be there for him. He was born a couple of days after your last meeting, and we had to stay in hospital for more than six weeks. I never worried about him because I was so convinced that he knew already what was going on. He was so strong. He handles everything: the problem with his kidneys, being in the hospital and being operated on several times already. It’s my worry that I’m doing something wrong. I want to keep him the way he is – so pure. I really want to protect him from the world.
John: Your self. Protect your son from your self.
If you are taking seriously only what you know the truth of in your heart while you are in your self and with him, then through example he is protected from your self and his, and his self, through example, will grow and develop just as your self does. You’ll be parenting your self and his self from within what you are knowing the truth of in your heart.
Q: I think in my heart, deep in my heart I know I’m doing it right, but there’s an upper layer that makes me confused.
John: Don’t take that to heart and you’ll be making it easy for your son to also not take the same thing to heart. If you’re worrying that you’re doing the wrong thing, you’re doing the wrong thing. If you’re worrying that you’re doing the wrong thing, you’re believing your self. You’re believing the impressions in your self, and you’ll be teaching your son to believe those same impressions.
Give him what you know the truth of in your heart through example in your self while it’s still easy with him. You’ll be growing, in this way, with him. While difficulty slowly comes in, teach him this way and when he’s grown up he’ll know his way. His real foundation needs to be put together before all of his difficulty comes.
For you to be sure of it coming together in him, it needs to come to him from you. He will read your heart and he will read your self. Because your self has more form than your heart, he will naturally try to be just like your self. If he sees that you are parenting your self as much as you are parenting his, he will love the parenting that comes from your heart – your being what you know the truth of in your heart.
Q: The self you’re talking about is no good? Is that correct?
John: Incorrect. Your relationship to your self isn’t good. Your self is good. Your self is innocent. Change your relationship with your self and your self will change. Your self naturally becomes what you are being in it. Your son will naturally become what you are being with him.
As he comes into his own power, which will be coming soon, he will need to feel your power. He will need to feel the clarity and the certainty of your power, your power governed by what you know the truth of in your heart. If he doesn’t feel that and experience that, he won’t know what to do, in his experience, with all of the new power that he’ll be coming into. He’ll be out of control with his own power. If he feels your power containing his power from within what you know the truth of in your heart, he’ll be experiencing from you what power is for and what power isn’t for, making him feel safe within his experience of his own power.
When he’s feeling your power while he is experiencing his own power, you can neither be hard on him nor soft on him. Your tendency will be that when you experience the pressure of his power being used in him, that pressure will have you feeling emotional and you’ll be hard on him. If you’re relating to being heart-felt, you will be soft on him. If you are relating only to what you know the truth of in your heart, you will be direct and clear. He’ll know your certainty concerning himself and he’ll know your beingness. He’ll need to experience both from you.
505 – Awakening to the More of You
Having been raised in a male environment, this person longs for more of the feminine qualities he’s now coming to know. As he speaks with John, it becomes clear that a shift in his relating is all that’s required.
504 –
This conversation zooms in on the micro-movements of awareness in form, and how it can choose between the addictive power of illusion or the healing power of oneness.
503 – The Integration of Sexual Energy: No Longer Using or Resisting Its Power
John responds to a woman who has begun to fear her sexuality when it comes up around others, knowing that her way of controlling it isn’t true.
502 – No Longer a Victim of Your Sensitive Self
Others’ anger in his relationships or at work always leaves this person feeling hurt and guilty. Why is this, and how can he live with his super-sensitivity?
501 – Parenting with Clarity: How to Say ‘No’ to Your Child
How do you say “no” to a child in a way that doesn’t feel restrictive and frustrating? John shares the magic of the “no” that is full of “yes” … a clarity that opens a child to its deeper resources of goodness and love.
500 – The Way of Love: Giving Permission for Deep, Inner Change
“You’re naturally coming into what many people spend a lot of time and a lot of money on, without result: profound awakening.” John speaks to a person experiencing the fear and vulnerability of deep, inner change.
“My sole purpose is to be, in life, what we are after we’ve died. Through openness and softness of heart and core-splitting honesty at any personal cost, I live as that while actualizing the same in others I meet. I am available as a resource for anyone who recognizes and values this way of being.”
– John de Ruiter
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