Q: John, being here with you it’s easy to be in this because you carry us there, I love being in that, and I came here because I knew of that and I fail to live it.

John: You’re not dead yet.

Q: No, I am not. And I have a sense of what in my daily life pulls me from this. It’s like a strange mixture of protecting my self and parts which I have disowned which I don’t want to see. And I’m not dead yet so I would like to ask for help, how I can keep the clarity in the small things.

John: Head up. Face forward. Heart in. That leaves a void behind you where your conditioning belongs.

Q: What you’re saying means no hiding, no trying to figure out whether it’s right or wrong but just following that stream inside…jumping off a cliff, in a way. It’s not as dramatic, but is that correct?

John: Stepping away from the cliff of your conditioning. There isn’t a fall in that. Your conditioning is your comfort. When you seriously consider stepping away from it, it’s no longer your comfort; it’s a fearsome thing. That’s where you have your head up, your face forward, and your heart in, in what you know, and walking. Your conditioning has been your comfort. You’ve made it that way. Your conditioning is also fearsome to you. You’ve made it that way. It needs to be behind you and no longer in you because of it being believed. Knowing, believed, sweeps the conditioning of your self out of your heart.

Q: Would it be helpful for me to be able to recognize the conditioning, or are you saying that staying in my awareness, with not knowing and the rest will follow?

John: With your head up, your face forward and your heart in, you’ll be encountering your conditioning. As you encounter it, it belongs behind you.

Q: What was happening in me just now…that is that?

John: That doorway is of greater value than your living. It’s what you’ll enter when you die. You need to enter it and live by it in your living. Your conditioning has no part in it. It has no place in it. In this doorway you are without the company of your self.

This is what needs to pattern and to condition the company of your self. It changes what your self is for. Whatever this patterns and conditions of your self is then the company that you have in your self. What is patterned and conditioned of your self by this, you’re able to bring of your self into this. A self of this belongs in this.

When you die you enter this doorway, and you’ll be bringing with you anything of your self that is of this. Anything of your self that isn’t of this that has been in your company doesn’t enter this. It falls off. It will fall off like the leaves on a tree. In entering this doorway while living, you are being this, and in living that you’re changing your self. You’re patterning and conditioning your self by this.

This is inclusive only of this. Your conditioning, while you’re living, gives you the opportunity of making this that you know the truth of, real. Making it real means that you are making it your self. As you make choices and decisions from within this, this takes form as a self with structure and function. The conditioning in your self is then like scaffolding that slowly passes away.

Entering this doorway has you functioning differently. That function becomes the functioning in your self. What isn’t like this in your self fades and it loses its function. In that way, your conditioning, the conditioning in your self, serves you well. It has you realizing specifically, in your living, what you’re not going to function as.

Q: You mean the old conditioning is going to show up that I’m not functioning from knowing when I’m not.

John: You’re privileged. You’re knowing and seeing the doorway without having died.

Q: I’m blessed for the help I receive from you.

John: Others would die to see this, and they will. Your living in this makes what this is, visible. It makes it palpable to the rest of us. It makes palpable what others know and can’t grasp. You are grasping it. As this apprehends you, apprehend this. Your conditioning doesn’t stop you. It enables you to see what you don’t need in apprehending this.

As soon as you’re seeing in, time changes for you. Time becomes transformative. You’re in it and it changes everything. It enters what your self is. It awakens what your self is.
Awakened to the functioning in this, the veils in your body start to move, changing your knowledge of physical reality. The levels, within, open and they breathe. The rhythm of that enables you to follow the change of your form.

What you are after you die becomes living form. It becomes real. Having form distracts from that. Being what knowing is, in the midst of your form, has you attracting to this. It has you coming into what you knew and couldn’t accomplish in your self, couldn’t realize in your self, couldn’t be and couldn’t do.