601 – Don’t Go Figure, Go Sweetly Within
Sometimes, figuring things out doesn’t work in the way we expect. Dissolving core patterns is one example of this, and John explains why.
Q: Hi, John.
John: Hi Rishi.
Q: After spending some days with you I got so much, and I feel so much richness inside. I would love to ask you some questions, maybe to support other people to understand what is going on while meeting you. Maybe the first question: what is the essence of your teaching, if I can call it a teaching? Because I know it’s much more than teaching.
John: That most of reality is unseen. A little bit of reality can be perceived from within our selves, and that’s through our senses, within everything of physical reality. But the depth of reality, what is unseen to the mind and to our selves, is all of the deeper levels of reality which correspond to all of the levels of our being, so the essence of the teaching is how to awaken to that, and from where you awaken to that. From where is within the heart. It’s not in the self. The self is a vehicle of expression for the whole of reality, but the entrance to the deeper levels of reality, which is what most people are missing out on, is the heart – and it’s not just the heart, but it’s openness and softness of heart.
Q: Yes, you speak a lot about the heart as a door to the being and also I see how it’s difficult, sometimes, to make this opening. Why is it so important?
John: Without the openness and softness of heart, what we are being won’t be the same as our being, so if we’re not being the same as our own being we have no access or entrance to our being. As soon as there is openness and softness of heart we are being the same way, within the heart, as our being, so there the door to the being opens.
Q: What do you mean by saying “being”? Is it the essence of who we are? Is it the inner life?
John: The deep inner life that is from within our selves all unseen, but when the heart opens, the deeper levels of what we really are begin to move, and they move up into the heart, enabling us to experience that greater depth of what we really are that is out of view of our thinking and our feeling.
Q: You speak a lot about what is not real. What do you mean by not real? That we live life, and part of it is not real?
John: Our selves are actual. Thinking and feeling and emotions are all actual. The will is actual, but none of that is real. The beginning of what’s real is the heart and particularly the heart opened and softened, so it’s beingness that is real, and without that beingness infilling our selves, our selves remain actual but not real. And as we take our selves seriously we separate from the real and it’s the real that nurtures, that nurtures us and that nurtures the self.
Q: So what is the full potential of being a human being?
John: The full potential of what we really are is that our selves are able to open and shift and transform, so that our selves become just like our beings; that our selves, in all of their forms, become just like what we really are, and from there our personalities and our persons, in our life, become the same as what we really are. So the real potential is that all of this form that we have turns into the same as what we really are.
Q: You speak about something that is immediate, and not a process. Can you say something about this?
John: The immediate comes by a shift of awareness.
Q: That we don’t need to develop our self?
John: The immediate is that, as awareness, we’re able to shift in such a way that we’re being what we really are as awareness, which at first is not inclusive of our personality, our life and our selves. So the shift is so subtle, so fine, so deep within, and because it’s not inclusive, at first, of our forms it also doesn’t require the use of our forms. Without the use of our forms that shift is instant, whereas with self-development, where we’re working on our selves and developing our selves, that engages the entire process of our selves opening in the way that awareness is able to open.
Form changing is much more slow than awareness opening.
Q: And the form will follow it later?
John: Yes: and it isn’t just later, it instantly begins following, so it instantly starts to change. Whatever we are, as awareness, being within our selves, our selves are already becoming. As we open, the mind opens, the emotions open, the will opens and turns into willingness. As soon as we close and harden in our hearts, our selves close, our selves harden. Our selves are always instantly becoming what we are being in our selves, so the whole focus, then, is not on our selves; it’s on what we really are as awareness, so all of the potential of our forms, of our selves, is dependent on what we are being as awareness.
Q: Is there any reason that the true is hidden or not seen so clearly?
John: The truth isn’t seen immediately and so clearly when we’re focused on our selves. In our selves what we relate to are the powers of our selves, the powers of thought and feeling, of will and emotion. These are all wondrous powers, but they’re also just as much distracting. There’s so much capability within these powers that when we’re relating to our selves, what we relate to is all that we’re able to do, so we become used to doing. We become addicted to doing and we rely on our capacity to do to then come into what’s deeper within, and the doing doesn’t enable us to be. It’s our deep, inner beingness that brings out the depth and the quality of our doing.
Q: This is the reason we have so much suffering, pain and depression in our culture today?
John: Yes. When we’re reliant for meaning, when we’re reliant on our selves, depending on our selves, that immediately puts us also into the lack that’s there in our selves. It puts us into the imperfection and the incompleteness of our selves. As we’re focused on that lack, the imperfection, that brings in, on the level of our selves, the pain. It’s the pain of registering all of that lack and seemingly not being able to do anything about it, so then we do more thinking, more feeling, more use of our emotions; we engage our will more to address everything that’s imperfect and full of lack, and that only heightens the lack and the imperfection even more, which then leads to depression.
Q: Sitting with you there’s a strong impact coming, sitting with an enlightened teacher or master. What is the pulse that comes, this strong impact? It feels like it’s really changing so much inside, just being with you. What is it? You’re not doing healing, but so much healing is happening around you.
John: That’s because as a self and as a person, in my life, I’m embodying my being. I’m being the same as my being and that’s increasingly, over the decades, having form, so my self keeps becoming more and more like my being, as does my person. In that way I am embodying and vibrating to you your being, so when you’re around me your being moves because your being is in response to the same thing that it is. As soon as we sit together there’s a being connectivity. My being is moving and that moves your being, so you have an uncommon experience of your being moving as soon as we are together. Your being moves up into your self and you’re awakening to the depth of meaning in all of that. It changes your seeing, it changes your thinking, it changes your feeling.
Q: Why is it difficult for people to meet an enlightened teacher? I saw it in Israel – people running for spirituality and they found it difficult to come, to reach to a master and enlightened one. What are the difficulties? Why is it difficult?
John: Because it is fundamentally offensive to the sense of personal independence. In Israel that really stands out because there is so much independence that has been on the surface acquired, and so much fighting to keep it, so there’s the whole pattern of standing in your independence, standing in your self-identity, with that meaning everything. So that which seems to mean so much on the surface becomes a blindness, and anything that exposes that blindness also exposes the personal independence and the personal identity. So there’s a natural defense mechanism to keep secure what’s been fought for.
Q: So what should be the call for the people? What is a real call to come?
John: There are two different energies that take place, within, when you are around something that’s real. There’s a reactivity because of defending and protecting what’s being held on to within the self and in our lives, and there’s also a profound response.
When the heart is touched there’s naturally a loosening, an opening of the mind together with that openness of heart, and there’s a responsiveness of awareness from within the heart that flows through the self despite what that self is like. So there’s this love that moves, and as much as that is loved, within, it also threatens everything that we’re holding on to. As that love moves, we’re naturally letting go of all of the holding, but it’s the holding that gives us our sense of independence and our sense of personal identity. So then we’re caught in a split.
Q: So the fear is not real, actually, and I do say it a lot, and actually being next to you I feel that there is no fear. Can you say something about fear, or safety?
John: Fear comes with our stories, our stories around how we perceive our selves, our stories around how we perceive others. Our stories are full of lack, and because of the lack we naturally fear because we know we’re missing something. There’s something that’s not there, so instead of registering the goodness of what is not there, which causes an opening, we register what’s not there from the perspective of lack …
Q: Oh, my God!
John: … which makes us defensive and fearful. We fear, then, what we know is there within but we fear what we cannot see. So we move away from response to what we’re directly knowing, and we engage the fear in not being able to see, which separates us more from that deep inner knowledge.
Q: Maybe the last thing: you visited Israel. How is it for you coming to Israel, and do you have any message for the Israelis?
John: Because of all of the polarity that Israelis are caught in, the national polarity – there’s so much, so much war and defense, everything is made raw. Everything goes to the bone very quickly, which makes the people reactive, quickly reactive, but also very sweetly responsive. When goodness touches someone in an environment like in Israel, because everything is so stripped down to the raw, when goodness touches, goodness quickly goes right to the bone, so quickly there’s response. And when something offends the self, that also quickly goes right to the bone, so right away there’s reactivity.
So to see the difference of what reaches the bone, there’s only the one that nurtures. When there’s a touch of the heart, there’s an opening to the bone. When it touches the mind and the self, there’s a reactivity. See the difference and then love the responsiveness to what touches, and start to let go of, and not need to identify with, the reactivity. The reactivity makes us really small and hard. The responsiveness to the touches of heart opens us and enables us, as awareness, to expand in our selves which enables the self to also expand and open, and be so much bigger than our little selves.
Q: I got so many questions coming next to you, also much insight coming next to you. I really thank you for your time. Thank you for your presence and the presence you bring to us. Thank you, John.
John: It’s lovely being with you.
Q: Thank you.
601 – Don’t Go Figure, Go Sweetly Within
Sometimes, figuring things out doesn’t work in the way we expect. Dissolving core patterns is one example of this, and John explains why.
600 – Out of Your Comfort Zone, Into Your Heart
A perplexing and destructive habit is the focus of this dialogue. What could be so threatening about being touched by goodness?
599 – Parenting: What Your Child Really Wants from You
John responds to a mother’s wish to understand why her young daughter still seems unhappy, despite her best efforts at parenting.
598 – The Person, the Self and the Being: Identifying the Many Levels of You (Part 2)
This dialogue is a continuation of last week’s podcast 597. John speaks about what ego is, the power we have to create mystery to conceal what is clear, and what takes us deeper than personal integrity.
597 – The Person, the Self and the Being: Identifying the Many Levels of You (Part 1)
Person, self, being … what’s the difference and what is real? Using different analogies, John explains how our different levels connect and shares the code to being what we really are.
596 – Beyond Sadness and Pain: Happy Without a Reason
John reveals the source of the deep well of sadness and pain this person carries, and shares how she can reconnect with her original happiness.
“My sole purpose is to be, in life, what we are after we’ve died. Through openness and softness of heart and core-splitting honesty at any personal cost, I live as that while actualizing the same in others I meet. I am available as a resource for anyone who recognizes and values this way of being.”
– John de Ruiter
Cookie | Duration | Description |
---|---|---|
cookielawinfo-checkbox-advertisement | 1 year | Set by the GDPR Cookie Consent plugin, this cookie is used to record the user consent for the cookies in the "Advertisement" category . |
cookielawinfo-checkbox-analytics | 11 months | This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Analytics". |
cookielawinfo-checkbox-functional | 11 months | The cookie is set by GDPR cookie consent to record the user consent for the cookies in the category "Functional". |
cookielawinfo-checkbox-necessary | 11 months | This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookies is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Necessary". |
cookielawinfo-checkbox-others | 11 months | This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Other. |
cookielawinfo-checkbox-performance | 11 months | This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Performance". |
elementor | never | This cookie is used by the website's WordPress theme. It allows the website owner to implement or change the website's content in real-time. |
PHPSESSID | session | This cookie is native to PHP applications. The cookie is used to store and identify a users' unique session ID for the purpose of managing user session on the website. The cookie is a session cookies and is deleted when all the browser windows are closed. |
viewed_cookie_policy | 11 months | The cookie is set by the GDPR Cookie Consent plugin and is used to store whether or not user has consented to the use of cookies. It does not store any personal data. |
Cookie | Duration | Description |
---|---|---|
locale | 1 month | This cookie is used to store the language preference of a user allowing the website to content relevant to the preferred language. |
Cookie | Duration | Description |
---|---|---|
_ga | 2 years | The _ga cookie, installed by Google Analytics, calculates visitor, session and campaign data and also keeps track of site usage for the site's analytics report. The cookie stores information anonymously and assigns a randomly generated number to recognize unique visitors. |
_gid | 1 day | Installed by Google Analytics, _gid cookie stores information on how visitors use a website, while also creating an analytics report of the website's performance. Some of the data that are collected include the number of visitors, their source, and the pages they visit anonymously. |
CONSENT | 16 years 2 months 18 days 8 hours | YouTube sets this cookie via embedded youtube-videos and registers anonymous statistical data. |
yt.innertube::requests | never | This cookie, set by YouTube, registers a unique ID to store data on what videos from YouTube the user has seen. |
Cookie | Duration | Description |
---|---|---|
IDE | 1 year 24 days | Google DoubleClick IDE cookies are used to store information about how the user uses the website to present them with relevant ads and according to the user profile. |
NID | 6 months | NID cookie, set by Google, is used for advertising purposes; to limit the number of times the user sees an ad, to mute unwanted ads, and to measure the effectiveness of ads. |
test_cookie | 15 minutes | The test_cookie is set by doubleclick.net and is used to determine if the user's browser supports cookies. |
VISITOR_INFO1_LIVE | 5 months 27 days | A cookie set by YouTube to measure bandwidth that determines whether the user gets the new or old player interface. |
YSC | session | YSC cookie is set by Youtube and is used to track the views of embedded videos on Youtube pages. |
yt-remote-connected-devices | never | YouTube sets this cookie to store the video preferences of the user using embedded YouTube video. |
yt-remote-device-id | never | YouTube sets this cookie to store the video preferences of the user using embedded YouTube video. |
yt.innertube::nextId | never | This cookie, set by YouTube, registers a unique ID to store data on what videos from YouTube the user has seen. |