Excerpt from a dialogue with John de Ruiter from the March 18, 2001 meeting in Edmonton, Canada
Q: I’ve been seeing how control and tightness exist in the core of what I was born into. There’s now so much more space for real living than I chose before, and this tightness also affects my relationship with money. Can you speak about that, and the tightness at my core?
John: That is tied into personal survival and maintaining being the centre of the universe. Instead of having a personal identity, which separates you from the rest of the universe wherein you are using the universe in order to cope, instead of maintaining a personal identity and being separate, from the universe, know your self within the whole universe. Then, instead of there being the need to personally survive, what survives is the beingness within you.
Money is energy. Do you relate to such energy with personal rigidity or a sweet openness? The energy of money is to be integrated: knowing how to be in the energy of money, while at the same time knowing your self and not needing to have a personal identity within the energy of money.
Q: It seems to go so deep. I don’t understand it but I know my life’s been driven by this control around money.
John: Your relationship with money is your mind on display. It displays the present nature of your mind. The mind doesn’t change easily; it is first governed by patterns. When you’re knowing your real self in context of those patterns, then you’re confronted by those patterns. They would have you being a different way than how you actually know your true self to be. It is being your true self, in context of those mental patterns that invites those patterns to open. That is change. You cannot change the patterns. You can only be your real self in the midst of them. That causes the patterns of your mind to transform. The patterns of your mind will match what you are being. They do change by transforming, but that is slow.
The change within your own heart can be in an instant. The mind matches slowly, and the body matches even slower. Your mind is a display of what you came into this world with, and your mind is also a display of what you were being. Let gentleness manage your money.
Q: I don’t think I know how.
John: Be open to being gentle with your money. Then the energy of what money is, is open and soft within you. Instead of money and the energy of it being cold within you, let money and the energy of it within you be warm – warm, living cash, instead of cold cash. There is a beingness to money. Find it. Have a relationship with the beingness of what money is. That is having a real relationship with the love in money, instead of the love of money.