Q: I have a feeling of what makes my heart sing. Where I am right now doesn’t make my heart sing, doesn’t fulfill me. When do I know when it’s time to move on, and where to go? If I have limitless options of where to go, of what to do in life, how do I know where to go, what to do?

John: Take none of your options – not one – and go straight to your heart and there, within your heart, be quieted and gentled, for there you’re home. And from there you can choose any of your options. None of them matters very much. What matters is what you’re in and what you’re coming from.

If you’re not at home in your heart there’s no option that satisfies you. While any of your options will satisfy something in your self, that satisfaction in your self won’t satisfy you. What satisfies you is when you are at home in your heart, at home, gentled and quieted in what you know in your heart. What you know in your heart has nothing to do with options in your self and in your life. What you know in your heart is the simplicity of beingness.

Q: But if I’m busy all the time, if I work 50 hours a week, how can I come into my heart? Doesn’t that mean I would have to move on to have time to come into my heart?

John: While you’re at work, you have 50 hours a week at work to be in your heart. If you won’t be in your heart while you’re at work, you won’t be in your heart when you’re not at work. If you are not unconditionally at home in your heart in the midst of anything, then you won’t be at home in anything.

Q: So it doesn’t matter whether I stay or go?

John: Yes.

Q: Because in the end that’s always the same, whether I’m in my heart or not.

John: Yes. The meaning of life is for you to come from your heart. The meaning of life isn’t in your self; it’s in your heart. It’s from within your heart that you connect to your own being. When you are gentled and quieted in your heart, that being gentled and quieted is your real beingness.

Q: When I’m here, and I want to go there then it’s like two sides.

John: You don’t need what you think and feel that you need. What you need comes from what you know in your heart. What you know in your heart is for you to be there in your heart. When you’re there, you’re fine, regardless of where your self is, regardless of what occupies your self or what you put your self to. All that really matters is that you are in your heart and you’re coming from what you know in your heart.

Your heart, your heart centre, matters more than all of your self. It’s when you take your self to heart that you leave your heart. When you take what you know in your heart to heart, your heart is filled with what you know. It’s filled with your own beingness. When you take your self to heart, you’ll be empty, empty of meaning, because you’ve filled your heart with your self and meaning doesn’t come from your self. Meaning comes from your own being. Your self doesn’t belong in your heart. Your being belongs in your heart, and your being-filled heart belongs in all of your self.

The meaning of life doesn’t come from your self. It doesn’t come from what you do with your self. It comes from you being in your heart, and because of that, your being coming into your heart, and because of that your being-filled heart fills the rest of your form. It fills your self, your person, and your life.

Q: So it’s not about saying I want to do this because I think it fulfills me.

John: It won’t.

Q: It’s about being fulfilled in my heart, and I will be fulfilled because I am fulfilled in my heart.

John: Yes.

Q: How do I get there?

John: Quietly. When it is quietly, it’s without any kind of story. It’s without any kind of want or need, because quietly is like your own being.

Q: When I feel that there’s a deeper core that just is, inside of me, is it staying in that feeling all the time?

John: No, because you don’t need to feel it. Feeling it means that you experience your own core in your self. Your core doesn’t come from your self and you don’t need to feel your core for you to be in your core. You being home, within, isn’t a feeling although when you’re home, within, it can be felt. When you lie down to go to sleep, it’s a feeling as long as you’re connected with your person, your day, your self, your past, and your future. But when you lie down to go to sleep and all of these quietly pass away, you’ve returned to being gentled and quieted in your heart, and as you fall asleep it’s not a feeling. You are entering deep home.

What you enter as you fall asleep is how you are to live; that this is what you’re rooted in. This is what you are, in the midst of pleasure or pain. When you experience pain in your self or pleasure in your self, the pleasure doesn’t add anything to what you really are, and the pain doesn’t take anything away from what you really are. The pleasure in your self and the pain in your self concerning anything in your life is incidental to what you really are, and if you’re being what you really are in the midst of anything that you’re experiencing in your self and in your life, then you are home in all of your life.

Everything is goodness, because you’re coming from it. If you’re looking for goodness as an experience in your self or as an occurrence in your life, if you’re looking for it it’s because you’re not coming from it. If you’re already coming from it, you won’t be looking for it. You’ll be the goodness, within, in the midst of all of your self and all of your life. You’ll be rooted as awareness in what you know instead of trying to be rooted as awareness in what you experience. Your experiences are not you. Your experiences are what you have in your self. The simplest of what you really are is openness and softness of heart.

Q: In daily life, answering emails, sometimes it’s difficult to be there, to stay there.

John: Then let go of what you’re hanging onto and it isn’t difficult to be in your heart. You may still have difficulty in your self, but no longer in your heart. You can handle any difficulty in your self as long there is no difficulty in your heart.

When you are at home in your heart, you have no difficulty there, even while there is difficulty in your self. When you are at home in your heart, the difficulty that you have in your self reveals your loveliness. When you’re not at home in your heart, the difficulty in your self reveals the lack that you identify with in your self. When you’re not at home in your heart, all that remains for you is gain and loss. Both refer you to your past and to your future, and both separate you from the nurturing present.

Q: So when I’m at home in my heart, there won’t be any difficulty.

John: Not in your heart, but certainly in your self because your self isn’t yet like you are.
When you are in your heart, you are being the same as your own being. That’s what makes you so much at home in your heart. But as much as you can be one with your own being because you’re dwelling within your heart, it doesn’t make your self like that just yet. But you being that in the midst of your self does slowly transform your self, little bit by little bit, until eventually your self becomes as you are in your heart and as you are one with your own being. Your self becomes what you’re being in it. What you are being within your self matters more than your self. If you live that, you will live manifesting your being in your self, and over time your self becomes like your own being.

There is difficulty in having a self, because your self is not like your own being. Everywhere that your self is not like your own being shows up as difficulty. When you are in your own being, even in the tiniest little bit of your own being, when you are simply quieted and gentled in your heart there is no difficulty there, and you are able to be without difficulty in the midst of any kind of difficulty in your self.

When you are like that, you are like a goodness parent to your self which is like your child. In that way, as you live you are raising your child to become just as you are. You’ll let your child – your self – be in difficulty by showing it how to be by what you are being in the midst of your self. You are its example. Your self naturally turns into what you are being in it.

When you are not at home in the midst of your self, then as you live your self becomes worse. You make it worse because you’re showing it how to be worse. You are its example. When you are at home in your heart in the midst of anything in your self and in your life, your self follows you and with each step becomes as you are.

Regardless of how painful or pleasurable your day has been, when you lie down to go to sleep, the pain and the pleasure pass away. As they pass away you enter your heart, and as you are at home in your heart you fall asleep. When you enter your heart, when you lie down to go to sleep, you are there, almost asleep, and when you go a little bit deeper than your own heart and you enter your own being, you fall asleep. That’s how you fall asleep.

That’s also how you live. That’s how you live as a being. That’s how you be in the midst of any amount of pain in your self, in your body and in your life, and in the midst of any amount of pleasure in your self, in your body and in your life. And that pain doesn’t take anything away from you, and the pleasure doesn’t add anything to you. What you really are precedes both.

Q: So it’s being the being I am, no matter what comes and goes around me.

John: Yes. That’s your life. Then you can gain this world and so sweetly not have more, and you can lose everything in this world and so sweetly not have less. Then you are happy deep within, not because of anything in your self, not because of anything in your life. You are happy first, before anything. You won’t be up and down like the weather in your self. You are constant beingness in the midst of any kind of weather in your self.

You are a being that is in a self, that has a self that isn’t like you yet, and the more that you’re being in it, the more it becomes just like you. The beauty of your self directly comes from you being in your self; you being at home in your heart in the midst of your self. There is nothing more to your life than this.

When that is completely settled in you, you will be manifesting your being in your life. But if that’s not enough for you, then you’ll separate from your heart, you’ll separate from your being and you’ll seek satisfaction in your self by using your self to produce it. And as much as you ever gain, you’ll have less and less. In everything that you come to, you won’t have your own being. All you’ll have is your self. You’ll have to keep it noisy and busy because as soon as your self is quiet, all you’ll realize is lack. You’ll have to keep your self spinning and spinning with thoughts and feelings. It’s not allowed to slow down because when it does you register your lack. Your lack is that you’re separate from your heart and your being, and filling your self with anything doesn’t fill your heart.

Q: When I am in my heart, the being I am, the storm will get quieter, because I’m showing my self how to be?

John: Yes. In all of your self and all of your life you have only one real option: you being at home in your heart and then in the midst of anything. That’s your life. Your life isn’t what you make of your self. Your life is you being at home unconditionally in your heart and how that makes your self.

You have no other real option. If you’re not honest to your heart, you have endless options. None of them are real.

Q: So it’s not as I thought, that I have to decide which way to take because there’s only one way..

John: Yes.

Q: .. being at home in my heart.

John: Yes. You’ve got it.

Q: The only thing I can decide is to be at home in my heart.

John: Or, to not. The only real choice you’re capable of is to be at home in your heart. Everyone else can have their thousand ways, and you love that you have only one. This world then doesn’t offer you anything but space to manifest your being in. But as soon as this world offers you something, you are leaving your own being, and whatever you gain in this world, you won’t have your heart and you won’t have your own being, and as soon as you are quieted, you’re empty. When you’re quieted, you realize all of the lack in your self. You realize how much your self isn’t like your own being and you are not with your own being.

All that there really is for you is all of you and all of your own being, one. All one. That’s all you have, but you know that the tiniest little bit of that is everything. You are happy with any subtlety of your own being in the midst of any manner of storm, in the midst of any amount of gain or loss. To you, a subtlety of your own being is everything. It’s your home. It’s what you really are. It’s what you come from. It’s how you move. It’s your life.

You love life, not because of anything it gives you, but because you are a being, a being with a life.

Q: So it’s okay that there’s some discrepancy, some difference between what my self experiences and how I am in my heart, how I simply be?

John: Yes. Nothing there needs to change. You don’t need to change anything in your self. You don’t need to make your self the same as your own being for you, awareness, to be at home in your heart. The discrepancy in your self doesn’t make you spin. It draws out your love. Your self not being like your own being makes you love. It reveals your being. Your self doesn’t need to be love; your being is love, and you are your being in the midst of a self that isn’t like that yet.

Q: This discrepancy gives me the opportunity to experience my being?

John: Not the discrepancy, but having a self enables you, a being, to experience you, a being. Your self is a level. It’s a level that belongs to your being, and it doesn’t matter then the condition of that level, be it high or low, be it painful or pleasurable. It makes no difference to you, to you as a being. It’s a level, the level of self that you have within which to manifest what you are, so its present condition matters not. That it is yours to be in, matters. It’s yours to manifest what you really are, in. You know how to make a home of any house.

Q: I have only one option in life: to be at home in my heart, to be the being I am, to manifest the love I am, and this seems to be the most beautiful option I can have.

John: Yes.

Q: It’s not horrible, life.

John: It’s a beautiful life, even in the midst of the most horrible times. You manifest what you really are as a being through all good times and bad. You make goodness out of everything.