Q: Hello, John. I’ve watched a lot of your, the videos, to see if I’m going in the right direction or not. But I can’t really understand what’s happening. Sometimes, recently, especially when I watch your videos I get a pressure in my head. It’s not painful, but it’s noticeable and then I can’t really differentiate between if I’m feeling my heart. It’s like I get this weird sensation throughout my body and the pressure gets sort of stronger and there’s like a frequency I can hear in my ears and the frequency changes, sometimes to a higher pitch or to a lower pitch. I’ve tried looking at different materials to try and explain what this is, if this is what you would call being relaxed or starting to get relaxed?

John: You’re awakening to what’s deeper than your self, unseen levels within. As those unseen levels of you awaken and come up into your experience, into your body, into your self, it changes your physicalized perception of reality so there are sensations taking place that you can’t find a context for, you don’t have an understanding of.

Q: With these sensations, I feel that like it’s good but, I don’t have an explanation for them. And sometimes I feel like I could maybe go deeper. So it feels like sometimes I stop myself out of, I guess, the fear.

John: That’s fine. It’s fine that you experience fear in that. It’s like an alarm that goes off in your levels of familiarity, in the common experience of your self, this is all out of its range. You’re, it’s like your self questioning you and telling you “are you, are you sure you want to go there?” and it has really nothing to say about it. It can’t offer explanation; it can’t give you insight. It’s just wary because all of this is out of its range. So, that that brings up some fear in you is fine. It alerts you to not just step in without any deeper kind of knowledge.

Q: One of the videos I watched, you talked about how we develop conclusions throughout our life and I have to basically stop making conclusions of what I know to be the truth. And that helps.

John: Yes. In all of your life, don’t believe anything of a deeper nature that you don’t directly know the truth of, which relaxes your self from being an authority on the deep within. Your self doesn’t know: you know.

Q: You were also talking about as one continues to do this, the subconscious slowly melt with the conscious and he starts to, I guess, realize what he’s been hiding to himself or about himself.

John: The deeper you go within, that is past your self, beyond your familiar sense of self, the deeper your openness, a depth of openness within. That depth of openness also opens up your subconsciousness. You come into a subconscious knowledge of what your self is like, which is not at all like what you are opening up into that’s all deeper. But that depth of openness loosens a depth of what your self is really like.

It’s like a water barrel full of semi-clear water and there’s sediment at the bottom of it. That would be like your subconsciousness. You look into the water and you have an opinion about your self of how clean that water is, but as you open up within, deeper than your self, that stirs up that sediment at the bottom of the water barrel which brings it up into the water and gives you an experience of what your self is really like. But because you are not used to that it’ll feel like you are getting worse. You are not getting worse; you are just starting to actually get to know your self. It isn’t pleasant. All you have is what you directly know in facing the deep within. It’s unknown to your self. It doesn’t have content. It isn’t informational. It is of depth and quality and that’s the part that you know. You don’t know what it all means; you just know directly its depth and its quality, and for you that is reason enough to go that deeply within.

Q: As far as I’m aware, I really don’t know anything with my heart, but somehow I got to this point and I’m not sure how I really got here. That something guided me but I don’t know what that was.

John: That’s right. In your self, you don’t know anything about this, but you are drawn within. You’re responding to a depth within that you don’t understand, you have no explanations for, but it draws you, calls you and it alters your experience. As you go within you’ll be experiencing a whole different level of reality that you have no explanations for. The real that leads you in this is your sincerity.

Q: For the most part, it feels how I got to this point was not through my heart or the internal; it was more through the external. I have this pattern of making conclusions about the external, whether they may be true or not, but I don’t know with my heart and these conclusions that feel like they stop me.

John: It won’t stop sincerity. It can momentarily stop it, but sincerity keeps moving, and the direction of sincerity is deeper.

Q: And that goes with being gentle and soft and being relaxed.

John: Against all odds, sincerity finds its way. Sincerity is so much deeper than intention. Sincerity is the presence of authenticity in your self. It’s the presence of cleanness. Sincerity is the movement of honesty. While intention concerning your deeper interior is blind, sincerity knows something. It’s a level of knowledge that doesn’t offer understanding. It doesn’t offer explanation. It’s drawn within and it moves by a deeper resonance that it knows. What’s taking place with you is deeper within. It comes from deeper within than your heart.

Q: I don’t feel like I’ve done much for getting to know my heart.

John: Your heart is reached by openness and softness, but what is reaching you is deeper than your heart, bringing about sensations in your body, movement in your body that you can’t make sense of. Your body is adjusting and changing because of your response to the deep within. The deep moves and comes up into your body and starts to change your experience of reality.

Q: This sincerity, that’s slowly building up and that’s why I’ve been having these experiences because it’s trying to, I guess, draw me deeper within and show me, I guess, what I need to see at that moment or time?

John: There are changes occurring in deeper levels of reality and it’s your sincerity that is responding to that, opening into that. It introduces levels of perception within that are all new, and in your mind, you don’t know what to do with them. It isn’t offering you understanding.

Q: That makes sense. Most of this relaxation and trying to be openness, in a way I feel like it has been for myself to try and get a more deeper, I guess, knowledge or information whether for my self or just for the knowing.

John: Sincerity is the movement of permission given to the deep within. It isn’t a mental permission so it doesn’t come with mental awareness. What it comes with is a shift in what you’re able to perceive. Deeper levels of perception open(s) and it’s in your body. Sincerity isn’t understood. The nature of sincerity is that it is direct, within. Sincerity isn’t cognitive. Sincerity is your un-understood alignment with the real within. It isn’t a cognitive alignment. The sincerity doesn’t come from your self. It doesn’t come from your thinking. It’s a direct movement of what you really are.

Q: Is that from the being?

John: And deeper. Watch the movie ‘Close Encounters of the Third Kind.’ The character in it – it’s a parallel to this and is not the same thing as this – In that parallel, the character knows something. You realize at the end of the movie what it is that he knew all along but had no understanding of until he directly saw it and then he knew that was it all along. But it was deeply disturbing to him. He became so desperate in knowing something so deeply and having no understanding that he finally opened up his kitchen window, the window into his house, and he started shoveling dirt into his house. He looked like a crazy man. Then he went into the house and he started to form the dirt. He was desperately manifesting on the outside what he knows on the inside. And after he had formed the dirt all into one particular shape or pile on the floor, he sat back or stood back with a response of something like “that’s it, right there, it’s like that!” and he looks crazy, but he finally did something to manifest what he’s knowing all along. And in the end of the movie, he actually encountered directly what he’s been knowing all along. But until his direct encounter, his deeper level of experience was only destabilizing, confusing, offering no sense at all, yet he so deeply knew something.

Q: I think I understand what you’re getting at with that.

John: Because of your sincerity, regardless of the fear, you can’t help but continue.

Q: Sometimes I feel like I’m trying to avoid it but it always keeps coming back up, and at times stronger than what…

John: Just by virtue of your sincerity, regardless of the reactions in your self, you’re going in. You are available to what is beyond your self, way bigger than your self. Regardless of how that destabilizes your self, destabilizes your perceptions, you’re going in.

Q: Talking to you is a help in definitely understanding what’s happening.

John: Watch that movie.

Q: I will.

John: In your own way, you’ll relate.

Q: Thank you, John.

Bye for now.