Q: Hello John. I want to ask you some questions about maleness. As we know, there is a cycle in women, the monthly cycle, and I wanted to ask if there is something like a male cycle. Can you please speak on that?
John: What engages a deeper male cycle is you, as a person, in your self, no longer cycling male, no longer identifying with the male feeling, no longer being male, or in your identity being a man. The manness, the male, is there. It’s free to be there, just as it is, without you being that. Then you are what you really are, which is neither man nor male, there quietly within the male, within the man, which engages the opening of the male, the opening of the man.
Q: So it’s simple focused awareness, presence?
John: A little bit. It’s you, awareness, gentled and quieted in your heart, and it isn’t focused by you, a man, a person, a self. It’s just you gentled and quieted within your heart, and all of that takes place within the environment of the male, the man. There’s nothing sweeter in a man than a man just gentled within, and not being a man.
A man being a man is the makings of a jerk. It’s just you, gentled and quieted within, in the midst of what maleness or what manness happens to be there, that opens you and frees you from the maleness and the man, which allows, enables, the manness, the maleness to open into its deeper levels.
The man isn’t able to open that. It’s you being openness, within the environment of the man that opens it. So it’s organic, and it isn’t with purpose. As soon as you give it purpose, you’re being more sophisticated as a man, and you’re not being what you really are.
Q: So the beingness has no male or female qualities?
John: That’s right. Beingness has feminine energy and masculine energy, but it doesn’t move as manness or womanness.
The initial levels of the being are feminine in energy, such as okayness, openness, softness, and it’s all without the movement of any kind of power. The deeper levels of the being start to open up in a masculine energy, which also includes more power. But the entrance to the masculine energy of the being, the deeper levels of the being, comes through the initial levels of the being, which is feminine: openness, softness, and without any power. So in coming into your being, that first comes by you balancing in your whole relationship to power, which means you surrendering your power: giving away your power to openness and to softness of heart.
Q: Including sexual power?
John: Yes.
Q: I love your “Penis Mind” talk. I was listening to it. It’s so rich, and it’s so helpful to me. For me, I’m really there now where I lose my identity as a man. But a compass in me is knowing that behind that gate, there is something greater and softer and bigger.
John: It isn’t really so much that you’re losing your identity as a man. It’s really that you don’t need your identity as a man.
What fulfils the man is you being what you really are, a being, in the midst of the man that’s there, the self that’s there. There’s no focus on the man, the self; really, it’s just you, there. That’s what opens the self, opens the man.
See you later.
Q: Bye. Thank you.
597 – The Person, the Self and the Being: Identifying the Many Levels of You (Part 1)
Person, self, being … what’s the difference and what is real? Using different analogies, John explains how our different levels connect and shares the code to being what we really are.
596 – Beyond Sadness and Pain: Happy Without a Reason
John reveals the source of the deep well of sadness and pain this person carries, and shares how she can reconnect with her original happiness.
595 – When a Crumb of Truth in Your Heart is Your Home
John responds to a spiritual dilemma: a desperate longing for realization, coupled with the fear of nothingness that seems to come with it.
594 – Fully Present in Your Body, Fully Present in Your Heart
Closing down to the experience of vulnerability can mean dissociating from the body. John shares a simple way to become more present however uncomfortable we feel.
593 – Honest to the Way of Your Heart
An exploration of how honesty and an open, soft heart are connected, taking us ever deeper into the unseen roots we could remain in forever.
591 – The Truth About Compassion
When is compassion self-centred, when is it real, and how can we tell? An exploration of what it means to be truly compassionate.
“My sole purpose is to be, in life, what we are after we’ve died. Through openness and softness of heart and core-splitting honesty at any personal cost, I live as that while actualizing the same in others I meet. I am available as a resource for anyone who recognizes and values this way of being.”
– John de Ruiter
