JdR Podcast 405

Die Before You Die: Living as Pure You

This man both loves and fears a space in which he loses interest in the world, asking himself how, in the midst of that, he will pay the bills? And what does John mean when he says "die before you die?" A reassuring, inviting dialogue about what we're really here for.

"What you are, after you’ve died, loves having everything that’s yours. And it loves paying your bills. It has no trouble with anything."

—John de Ruiter

Podcast Transcript

With John de Ruiter from the November 1, 2018, Poleg Beach, Israel Event

Q: What is the meaning “to die before you die, consciously?” I would like you to share with me this energy.

John: What it means for you to die before you die is for you to be what you are after you’ve died, while you live: for you to let what you are, after you’ve died, have your body, your self, your personality, your mind, your emotions, your feeling, your skills, your work.

Q: And it’s happening to me now?

John: Is it?

Q: It feels like it. Maybe it’s a self-trance or something.

John: (shakes head: no) If it’s a self-trance, try to do it on your own. It won’t work. You can’t come into this through your self, because this isn’t your self. This is a little bit of what you are after you’ve died.

Q: Sometimes I feel that in that state the mind puts me into a trick that I’m selfish because I more and more lose interest in the world, in the things that I wanted before, ideas that I love. In the moment I sit here some thoughts jump: “if you are going to stay like this, how are you going to pay the bills?” Like, tricky! But I still listen to that which is here.

John: You let this pay the bills because you let this do all of your work. You let this have your life, have your self, have your mind. You let this have everything. When this has everything, this will pay your bills.

Q: I feel that there are many times the world tries to catch me down and tell me: “Come, come, you cannot stay like this” in many, many tricks. The more I’m deep, it can be noise of the mother, the noise of the most close friend – everything.

John: You get caught in it all, but you also know better. You know better because regardless of anything in this world, you know. And you don’t know because of this world. You don’t know because of your self. You know because of you. What you are, after you’ve died, loves having everything that’s yours. And it loves paying your bills. It has no trouble with anything.

For you to be enfolded by you, by this pure you, is you dying before you’ve died, is you being what you are after you’ve died, while you live. It’s what you’re here for. It doesn’t even make a difference if you cry or not because you know. Then, if you cry, you cry because you know: the opening of your self because there you are, being you in your self: wondrous, amazing, real, and true. You are plugging into you, and it’s extraordinary for you.

Q: Thank you. Now I have the fear that I’m going to stay like this forever!

John: You’ll be like this forever, for sure, after you’ve died. And, if you like, while you live.

Q: It’s okay to live like this?

John: Now you have died before you’ve died. Now, live before you die.

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