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New Cutting Edges in the Self: Meeting as a Being in Sexuality

Excerpt from a dialogue with John de Ruiter on October 13,  2014

Q: I wanted to talk to you about cutting edges. Is the cutting edge only in form on the self or the person level but not on the deeper levels?

John: That’s right.

Q: Sometimes I have a sense that I need to reach for more – I would describe that as a cutting edge.

John: If it is in the application of your deeper levels and what you know in your self, it involves a cutting edge. But when it is you realizing what you know in what is deeper than your self, that’s just you as awareness going straight into what you know, because you know.

Q: And the cutting edge would be what that implies for my self and my person?

John: Yes.

Q: OK. And at the cafe table did you say to me that I can only find my next cutting edge in lovemaking?

John: That’s where it most lands for you.

Q: And can you say what happens in lovemaking that creates the potential for a next cutting edge?

John: Using your body to communicate your being with him is the most direct way of making your own being physical. If there’s anything in that where you’re not getting the code right, then it won’t be your being that you’ll be communicating to him.

Q: Then it will be my self. And when I communicate my being to him in that, I can find my cutting edge.

John: Find it in using your body to communicate in a way that is accurate to what you know.

Q: So that would also change – it wouldn’t always be the same?

John: That’s right. There are so many cutting edges, when you manifest your being through your body with him, the intricacies are endless.

Q: You told me to make the whole next day about that cutting edge. What do you mean by that?

John: When the two of you come together in a way that is based on your being, and that’s made physical, that’s the reset in your relationship. Whatever you realize in that time belongs in all of your next day. It’s what shows you how to live.

Q: So love-making has to have a kind of urgency in it – like I need to have it?

John: It’s not that you need to have it, but the more real your relationship is, the more you naturally, deeply want to be together. The depth of that is heart to heart and being to being, through your bodies.

Q: Can you say more about communicating your being?

John: It means that you’re finding him, in his body. Your self doesn’t find him. Your self is only able to find his self. For you, through your body, to find him in his body, you need to be your being, knowing his.

Q: Thank you.

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